How I’m Navigating the Fertility Issues Caused by My Eating Disorder

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How I’m Navigating the Fertility Issues Caused by My Eating Disorder
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Much like an eating disorder, infertility is grueling, painful, and often prohibitively expensive to treat.

Before I met my husband, I’d had one other significant relationship in my life, and it was with my eating disorder. The thing about being entangled with your own illness is that you can anthropomorphize that sick part of your psyche and blame it forI can’t speak for everyone who has lost a chunk of their life to an ED, but this is my experience.

Through the years, doctors reassured me that if I restored my weight to a “healthy” range, my period would return, and my fertility would be spared. I dutifully attended appointments, completed two intensive outpatient programs, kept food logs, reduced my exercise, and watched the scale steadily creep up—however, my period remained MIA.

From 16 to 36, this dysfunctional dynamic with my body remained the primary relationship in my life outside of family. When I tried to date, the prospect of an actual human infringing on my long-term relationship with my eating disorder overwhelmed me. Somehow, someone broke through that barrier.

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