For Black women, choosing to be soft in relationships is hard. However, it's worth it. Ineye Komonibo (ineyekomo) writes about 'living your life in a way that makes space for vulnerability, and subsequently, peace' in a new essay:
The first step of living the life that you want is understanding that you don’t have to be God’s strongest soldier to make it happen.“We spend so much of our time taking on responsibility for everything and everyone as Black women,” my roommate bemoaned in one of our mid-day chats. “And after living through a pandemic that’s lasted for 10,000 years, I’m just tired. I don’t have the capacity to be the strongest person in my group or the one always looking after somebody else.
is acts of service. I’d always thought that being independent was just my nature, but was it possible that the quality was a trauma response to the turmoils of life that I had turned into a personality trait? What if the real appeal of being served was just my inner child trying to make up for lost time?
After playing tough your whole life, you don’t just wake up soft; you have to choose it, every single day. Allowing yourself to be complimented, catered to, and cared for. Letting people’s actions speak for themselves and acting accordingly when they do . Hoping for the best because you know that you deserve it.
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