We still shame the act of penetration, even on a linguistic level
” in front of a group of people was on a work away day when a very sweet, older colleague overheard the conversation and assumed we were talking about laundry. No one had the heart to explain to her what the word now meant, so we all sat round, chatting about peg bags and retractable washing lines until lunch was over.
I’ve never done it, not because I am particularly averse to the idea, but I’ve never been asked to. It’s not a sex act that has ever appealed to me. Like poodleballing and water sports, it’s just not on my radar. Of course, if I was with someone who loved it, I would absolutely roll up my sleeves and get stuck in. Who knows? I might even find out that I liked it too. There has been many a time that I have found myself enjoying something a lot more than I assumed I would.
So why are so many straight men all clenched up about bum fun? If you’re reading this and thinking, “I’m not, Kate,” then hurrah! I love that for you. But, the fear of doing anything that might be perceived as “gay” is so pervasive among heterosexual men that it has a name: homohysteria.papers have been published on this very subject. I suspect it’s the perceived link between being penetrated and passivity. That penetration equates to a loss of masculinity or, putting it bluntly, being the girl.
I’ll admit that those are both good jokes, but they do little to destigmatise pegging as emasculating. Just use a bit more lube!
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