“Life lessons”? Nah.
, and facing death does make a person reflective. I’m skeptical, though, that the dying have good advice for the living. We seem to have, at best, pretty empty advice that you’ve seen elsewhere already. At worst, it’s actively bad advice for anyone who isn’t dying soon.One lesson that the dying are supposed to teach is to live every day like you’re dying. But I’ve tried it: I’ve ordered coffee like I’m dying, gone for a walk like I’m dying, had conversations like I’m dying.
Appreciating the smallest moments makes them feel important, and it’s impossible to appreciate them all. Both things are true. Even to appreciate one moment a day would be an achievement, one I’ve been prompted toward for years. The message is in every self-help book, and on inspirational mugs and pillows and signs. So cancer did remind me to live in the moment—so does Pottery Barn.What’s different when facing death is the reason to appreciate this moment: there aren’t many left.
Those who aren’t dying should only be aware enough of the finitude of life to know you can’t do everything. It’s sad, of course, to think about all the books you’ll never read and the places you’ll never visit. But limitations alone don’t ruin our experiences. The length of the menu doesn’t affect whether I savor my meal, and I enjoy the book I’m reading without a thought to the ones I’m not. In fact, I might even value each book more if I know how relatively few of them I’ll read in my life.
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