EXCLUSIVE: Tom Daley on anti-trans prejudice and lawmaking: 'Trans people are being put in impossible situations. What happens if they can’t have gender-affirming care, and they can’t play sports? They’re constantly being pushed away and shut out.'
Earlier this week, inside the Stonewall Inn for the very first time, the site of the landmark,“I thought, ‘Wow, this is such a historic place. If only these walls could talk,’” Daley, the Olympic gold, multi-championship and medal-winning out-gay diver, told The Daily Beast. “This place is the start and heart of modern gay liberation. It felt really amazing to be there. For me, it was this moment of…” Daley paused.
“You’ve got states who won’t give young trans people gender-affirming care, and then you’ve got lawmakers and certain sports saying ‘You can’t play’ in this or that category. Trans people are being put in impossible situations. What happens if they can’t have gender-affirming care, and they can’t play sports? They’re constantly being pushed away and shut out. I feel extremely strongly people should be able to compete in the sports they love to do.
“It’s just incredible,” Daley told The Daily Beast. “I think about what it means for any queer young kids growing up thinking now, ‘Maybe I do now have a space in football, maybe I will get in, maybe I will be welcomed.’ It’s not just that the queer community has been so celebratory of it, but the fact of seeing people like [English national team captain] Harry Kane speaking out about how amazing it is.
“It’s really difficult,” Daley said. “It’s one thing to guarantee the safety of LGBTQ people and athletes, but what about the people living there? For the longest time, I said such countries should be banned from holding events, but that just closes the door on them growing.
Tom Daley during a break from training for the 2016 Rio Olympic Games on Jan. 18, 2015, in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil.Daley “hung up my trunks” after the Tokyo Olympics last year, where he won a gold medal in the men’s synchronized 10-meter platform. Taking a year off, he has not been on a diving board since. Now he is contemplating his retirement, he reveals. The question seems to be when. “I am really conscious of it.
Robbie turns 4 next month and starts school in September, and is “an adrenaline-seeker,” climbing and jumping everywhere. “He’s a full-on little boy now, not a baby or toddler. He’s my little buddy. We go to lunch and museums, he has his own opinions and thoughts.” Rob Daley died aged 40 from cancer, having been diagnosed with a brain tumor in 2006. Tom’s grief over his beloved father’s death returns, he told The Daily Beast, at “big moments in my life where I think, ‘I wish he was here to see that.’ It’s not that grief gets smaller, you just learn to grow around it.”We’re each other’s safe place, and it’s really special. We have been together nine years and married for five. It’s nice to still feel that safety still.
“It wasn’t till I met Lance that I felt safe to say, ‘You know what? This is me.’ It was terrifying. My then-management was telling me I would lose my sponsorships, and what would happen if I was competing in a country that wouldn’t accept me. Dad had died, I was supporting my family. I got to a point where I thought, ‘I can’t deal with any of these questions. I want to be me and stop hiding.
“There are all kinds of pressures being an athlete in the public eye, and a gay athlete in the public eye, and figuring out what the balance is. You’ll never meet an athlete who is completely happy with their body. They are always looking at someone else’s body for inspiration or to strive towards. It’s about what’s best for you and not sacrificing your mental health to lose half a percent of body fat.
Contemplating aging, Daley says, “I always feel like I have always been older than I am. I also thinking aging is a beautiful process that shouldn’t be interrupted. Getting older also means getting wiser and more life experience. In terms of how I look, I don’t care. I am married and have a kid. I do what I do keep young, with exercising and a skincare routine. That makes me feel good.” Would he have Botox or plastic surgery? He laughed.
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