'No' is a complete sentence.
robs my patients of perspective, leading to difficulty with decision-making. Pre-existing mental health issues like childhood trauma or neglect cause adults to struggle with regulating uncomfortable feelings that arise when setting boundaries. For these parents, the idea of saying no feels existentially untenable. Over the course of treatment my patients slowly reclaim parental agency. I tell them that saying no is like growing a new muscle.
Imagine a country where women were guaranteed paid maternity leave and families had affordable, high-quality child care options. In this world, setting boundaries as a parent would not require a steely force of will, because American families would have support in raising their children. But as it stands, if you’re a parent who’s at your wits’ end, instead of beating yourself up for your failure to self-care, try shortening your family to-do list and setting some boundaries.Dr.
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