Dear Care and Feeding: How can I help my son get over this hurdle?
Stage fright is common and normal. I work with the CEOs of Fortune 500 companies who struggle mightily with stage fright and most people identify public speaking as one of their greatest fears. As someone who has been producing Shakespearean plays with third and fifth graders for 25 years, and as someone who performs onstage regularly as a storyteller, stand-up comic, and public speaker, I can assure you that this happens all the time.
I see it from novices and experienced performers. Corporate folk. College presidents. Clergy members. Nearly everyone whom I work with and alongside struggles in some way with this problem. In fact, I don’t particularly like the phrase “stage fright,” since it’s the most common reaction to public speaking and performing. I think it’s far more unusual to be someone like me, who is never nervous before or while performing on stage. We are the weird ones. Everyone else is perfectly normal.I would ensure that your son understands this. Often the worst part about being nervous onstage is the thought that you are the only one.
My 4-year-old son has a July birthday and our large, city school district has a September cut-off for kindergarten. The district takes a very hard line against “redshirting”—if you wait until 6 to send a kid to school, they’re going to first grade not kindergarten. But my kid is autistic and has a severe speech delay that can be summed up as “reads as well as he talks.” Two years of pandemic isolation did not help any of this.
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