I saw the discarded condom in the bin. For a moment, I felt like I'd left my body.
The non-consensual removal of a condom is called ‘stealthing’ I’d just had sex with my boyfriend. A bit of a quickie, no frills. Insecure about my body, I never wasted time in getting my clothes back on. So while he relaxed on the bed, I bent down to grab my top. That’s when I saw the discarded condom in the bin. For a moment, I felt like I’d left my body. ‘Had he taken it off afterwards?’ I wondered uneasily.
I only learned of the term ‘stealthing’ when I stumbled across a forum post of a young woman anonymously asking for help to determine whether she’d been raped. Her experience was similar to mine, and that term – ‘stealthing’ – kept coming up. So I did more research. On their website, Rape Crisis explains that stealthing happens ‘when people agree to have sex with a condom and then someone either lies about putting a condom on or removes it without the other person’s permission’.
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My boyfriend took the condom off during sex – and that means I was rapedI saw the discarded condom in the bin. For a moment, I felt like I'd left my body.
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