Miss Manners: They trash-talk my state even as guests in my home

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Miss Manners: They trash-talk my state even as guests in my home
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Should I tell them to cut it out, or just smile and nod?

Because your brother grew up in your area, he probably thinks that he has free license to insult it — forgetting that his siblings have remained loyal and do not feel the same.

But that does not mean, Miss Manners assures you, that you have to listen. You might say, “I know that you never thought much of our hometown, and I’m so glad that you have found one that suits you better. But I still love it here, and when you disparage it, it makes me feel terrible. I love having you at my house, and it seems that you like staying here, so perhaps while you’re here, you can find some things that you still like about the place that we still clearly love.

I am hosting a brunch in honor of a much younger friend, and I only know four of the 47 invitees. Would it be terribly tacky for me to have name tags for the guests? I’m 67, and the likelihood of me remembering all the names is very small. If it is relevant, the event will be held in my home.The desire to connect with all of your guests is commendable, but Miss Manners assures you that no one will expect you to remember all 47 names. The advantage of having so many guests in your home is that it is unlikely that you will have to greet any of them more than once.

Name tags feel a bit business-y, or like a high school reunion. Should you need to reference anyone, surely your young guest of honor will discreetly come to your aid — or indulge you afterwards in a rousing post-party game of “which one was the woman with the purple hair and the psychology degree?”

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