Dear How to Do It: I’ve developed new sexual appetites in my late 50s. They look a lot like my son’s college-age friends.
My husband and I have been together for over 20 years. He’s a good guy, the best friend I have, and I can see us growing old together. We have one child.
I do feel strongly that we should be able to have adult conversations about these things. Broaching the subject of wanting these experiences took a lot for me. I’ve never told my husband how unhappy our sex life has made me, and I don’t intend to. Doing so would hurt him unnecessarily. Am I missing any other possibilities? Does my plan seem sound? Am I being selfish or unreasonable? Writing this out makes me feel like I’m a terrible person, but if a friend were in this situation, I’d tell them to live life for themselves. I neither want to hurt my husband nor my family, but forgoing this aspect of myself is hurting me.
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