Stories of abuse are often a powerful reminder that we don’t know what’s happening behind closed doors. But as more and more doors are shuttered, it's important to remember that social distancing doesn’t have to mean social isolation.
for survivors making safety plans during the COVID-19 pandemic. Many of the non-pandemic related safety strategies, such as establishing a “code word” with a trusted loved one, still apply. With school closures leaving more children at home, it’s essential that they also be made aware of the “code word,” a pre-established safest room at home, and any phone numbers they can call for help if a parent is unable to.
“Isolation manifests itself in lots of different ways, but not wanting you to spend time with other people, not wanting you to participate in your normal activities — now COVID-19 can be used as an excuse for that,” says Katie Hood, CEO of, which educates young people about the difference between healthy and unhealthy relationships, as well as early warning signs of abuse.
For those who do choose to leave, actually getting out can take years. The financial hardships and emotional stress families face during the coronavirus pandemic could easily exacerbate cycles of abuse. Amelia*, 49, recalls multiple times, even after repeated police incidents, when she went back to her husband. Though she held an MBA and had previously worked in investment banking, when her son was born she became a stay at home mom without income of her own to rely on in order to leave.
For her part, Amelia encourages survivors who might be struggling to use the pandemic as a chance to reach out virtually, join a Facebook group run by a therapist, or connect with a professional to set up a facetime session. The pandemic is also a reason for survivors to reconnect with loved ones, even if they’ve lost touch.“Once you're down the rabbit hole of being isolated, you sort of lose your confidence in your ability to reach out to your friends and your family,” says Hood.
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