“Isn’t ADHD just an excuse for a lack of discipline?” No. Get the truth:
on things that interest them but can’t stick with other things, like homework. Such behavior suggests that the child with ADHD is being willfully disobedient or that a lack of discipline and poor motivation are the problems. But such behavior is neither willful nor the result of poor parenting.
If a task provides motivation and offers immediate gratification — such as playing a video game — a person with ADHD will have no problem sticking with it. Give these kids a task for which there is no external reinforcement or payoff, however, and their persistence falls apart. They jump from one uncompleted activity to another and become bored and disengaged.
As I frequently see in my practice, “active and curious” may describe boys who can’t sit still long enough to complete a task. I’ve seen children go rapidly from one unfinished game to another — as many as 20 different starts in 30 minutes. Such behavior does not allow for the completion of any game, nor for the mastery of the critical social skills that are developed through play.
“Isn’t it unfair to other kids when those with ADHD get special accommodations, like untimed tests and shorter homework assignments?”This question is one of the most frequently asked in my teacher workshops on ADHD. The answer requires understanding the distinction between fair and equal. To illustrate the comparison between fair and equal, think of telling a child with hearing aids: “Remove your aids during this listening test. I must treat you equally. It is not fair for you to have amplified hearing.”
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