Dear Abby: They don’t know their daughter is pregnant, and I’m not supposed to tell

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Dear Abby: They don’t know their daughter is pregnant, and I’m not supposed to tell
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Being in the middle of this family rift has me worried sick.

I feel stuck in the middle of this heartbreaking situation. The worry over it is making me ill. Should I share this news or stay quiet?While the breach in your family is regrettable, news of this pregnancy is not yours to give. If your granddaughter wanted to keep it a secret, she should not have shared it and put you in the middle. If you are wise, you will stay out of it.You printed a letter from an individual whose failing, elderly friend made an abrupt change to his will .

Your reply to the writer was to speak to the elder and ask why he changed his will. That is reasonable advice, but your answer should also have recommended a referral to the writer’s local Adult Protective Services office. Elder exploitation is rampant in the United States. It is not uncommon for caregivers, relatives, and other trusted associates to prey upon elders for financial gain. That may come about in many ways, but social isolation, dependence upon others, failing health and cognitive decline can make elders susceptible to abuse, neglect and exploitation.

Adult Protective Services typically uses trained investigators to detect exploitation and refer crimes to law enforcement. One could reasonably suspect exploitation when a 90-year-old makes a sudden change to a will to exclude a longstanding friend. Reporters may call local law enforcement, their state’s Adult Protective Services office or the U.S. Administration on Aging. As you cautioned, there is no time to waste.

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