Dear Abby advises a woman who is in an extremely abusive relationship.
I have been in a relationship for five years. It started out wonderful, but now I’m having second thoughts. He keeps putting my kids down and telling me I’m a bad mother. It’s so bad he has even put a knife to my throat. And, yes, he hits me.
I am not an angel, but I always stand up for him and have his back. However, I don’t see him having mine. There’s so much more I could say, but I am scared if he knew I was writing to you it would end up bad for me. I need help, but I don’t know what to do. He has isolated me from my family and friends. Please help me. —The man you are involved with is a dangerous abuser.
Tries to isolate you from family and friends; accuses people who are your supporters of “causing trouble.” The abuser may deprive you of a phone or car, or try to prevent you from holding a job.see alsoThe abuser says, “You make me angry” instead of “I am angry,” or says, “You’re hurting me by not doing what I tell you.”Is easily insulted, claiming hurt feelings when he or she is really mad. Rants about the injustice of things that are just a part of life.Kills or punishes animals brutally.
Says things like, “I’ll break your neck” or “I’ll kill you,” and then dismisses them with, “Everybody talks that way,” or “I didn’t really mean it.” Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
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