When my grandchild was born five years ago, my daughter suffered from severe postpartum depression and had to be hospitalized.
Her father, who is not in good health, and I lived seven hours away and traveled as often as we could to help out. At one point my son-in-law called and told me she was catatonic and not responding to him. It was terrifying.
Now, these few years later, her husband is pressuring my daughter to have another child. My daughter is understandably afraid, and I’m afraid for her. She thinks her husband has forgotten what they went through. I know it’s not my decision to make, but she’s my daughter, and I worry about her well-being. She knows how I feel but tells me she feels caught between my feelings and those of her husband. She told me I won’t always be around and she will have to deal with his resentment.
I don’t understand why he would want my daughter to risk another bout of the PPD she suffered the first time. I don’t want to sound critical of him, but he can be very selfish. Fearing for my daughter’s life after the birth of her child was one of the most stressful things I’ve ever experienced. Can you please advise me what to say to my daughter, or should I just keep quiet?I am sure your daughter is already aware of your opinion.
Dad is emotionally abusive and cares nothing about others unless they can help him make money, which has left him with no money and no friends. He has no conscience, no empathy and no consideration for the feelings of others. The last straw was when he demanded my husband and I take him into our house or else he would “kill himself.”
Even if we had a good relationship with him, my father is disabled and could never climb the stairs to where the bedrooms are, so it’s physically impossible for him to stay with us. After finding a social worker to assist him, I have decided to walk away for good. Am I selfish to disassociate from an absolutely toxic person even if he is family?Consulting a social worker was a good idea. The ball is now in the court of a professional.
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