Crypto-Averse Man Would Prefer Investing In Traditional Stock Market He Also Doesn’t Understand

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Crypto-Averse Man Would Prefer Investing In Traditional Stock Market He Also Doesn’t Understand
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FORT WORTH, TX—Dismissing the technology as a flash in the pan and doomed to fail, cryptocurrency-averse man Tim Blankenship told reporters Friday that he would prefer investing in a traditional stock market that he also doesn’t understand. “Call me old-fashioned, but I’d much rather trust my life savings with a more…

FORT WORTH, TX—Dismissing the technology as a flash in the pan and doomed to fail, cryptocurrency-averse man Tim Blankenship told reporters Friday that he would prefer investing in a traditional stock market that he also doesn’t understand.

I don’t want to keep up on the mystifying trends that affect crypto and lose all my money, when I could just as easily not keep up with the mystifying trends that affect the S&P or NASDAQ and lose all my money.” At press time, Blankenship had decided to invest his money in online blackjack since he at least understood how it worked.

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