We all owe Clippy an apology.
Clippy, Microsoft Word's perpetually upbeat '90s paperclip, is a joke. An embarrassment. A mercifully discarded relic of the distant past.I know that, and I'm sure you know that too. And I'm also sure it's no accident this worthless retro irritant's most visible recent comeback is as a little weapon charm in Halo Infinite, just so everyone can ruthlessly rocket launcher him into splattered Spartan oblivion over and over again.
So I did what any person with an imaginary axe to grind against a decades-old digital office feature would do and started typing, trying to goad the Fifth Paperclip of the Apocalypse that was surely lurking just below this benign surface into unleashing its pernickety and no doubt incorrect fury upon my text.
It's this refreshingly simple and personable treatment that has made me a reformed fan of the little guy, to the point where I'd dare to say there's a Clippy-shaped hole in all of our modern office programs. I'd love to be offered bite-sized pieces of information by an amiable little character when I'm elbow-deep in another Google Doc at 4 am, rather than manually fish out some plain text on a flat white background that's been buried in a menu inside a menu.
Wouldn't it be so much better if we could ask a mascot like Clippy? A mascot who doesn't pretend to know more than he does? Who doesn't masquerade as a human at the other end of a sterile chat line?
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