City of Tulsa to Close Blinds and Stay Quiet Until Trump Stops Knocking and Goes Away

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City of Tulsa to Close Blinds and Stay Quiet Until Trump Stops Knocking and Goes Away
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President Trump announced via Twitter that he’s planning a little Saturday soiree in Tulsa, Oklahoma, with a million of his possibly covid-infected pals. In response, the entire city has banded together the way my grandmother used to when I asked if my loudest friend could come over on a summer day during the time she blocked off for Young and the Restless and Bold and the Beautiful: “Let’s just see how we feel a little later.”\n

A little later, it was always too late

to have anyone over, and the cycle would repeat itself until my loud friend’s parents said I could just come to their house, leaving my grandmother to watch her soaps with a plate full of lemon cookies in peace. The editorial board of thenewspaper seemingly hopes for a similar outcome, since now is not a good time for loud, disruptive visitors, between the pandemic and nationwide protests against police violence.

“When the president of the United States visits your city, it should be exciting. We think a Trump visit will be, but for a lot of the wrong reasons, and we can’t welcome it,” the editors wrote, pointing out that the health care system for a city of 400,000 people probably can’t handle the potential outbreak of new covid-19 cases triggered by a giant crowd of out-of-towners. The authors also noted that Trump’s appearance would drain resources from an already over-tapped budget.

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