An elated Chris Cuomo shared the moment his basement quarantine officially ended.
“That is the face that tells the story,” a smiling Cuomo said while pointing at his daughter. “I am now allowed to be around my family.”“We’re still taking it slow. We’re not all hugging up and kissing and all that stuff,” Cuomo said. “But the kids, back in the picture. We’re figuring out our family gesture. We may go like this , or something like that. A little air kiss. But this is what I’ve been dreaming weeks for.” for COVID-19, was now also healthy.
“Cristina was released from quarantine,” Cuomo said. “She never got a fever. Her symptoms are getting better. She handled it so much better than I.”, Cuomo showed a video of what he referred to as his “official re-entry form the basement.” “This is what I’ve been dreaming of, literally for weeks,” Cuomo said as he joined his family and greeted them without touching like he’d spoken about to Cooper. “This is the dream. Just to be back up here doing normal things.”
No irony...the onion is much closer to accurate than many outlets. Fully Recovered Chris Cuomo Gradually Realizing Family Never Going To Let Him Out Of Basement
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Fully Recovered Chris Cuomo Gradually Realizing Family Never Going To Let Him Out Of BasementLONG ISLAND, NY—Saying recent improvements to his health had given him the energy to finally consider the strangeness of his situation, fully recovered CNN anchor Chris Cuomo gradually came to realize Monday that his family never intended to let him out the basement where he convalesced. “Cristina, are you out there, hon’? I think the lock down here might have gotten stuck?” said the visibly anxious Prime Time host, furiously banging on the deadbolted basement door leading to the main house and stressing that he was sure he could hear his wife and children milling around outside, but seemed to be intentionally ignoring his increasingly desperate calls for help. “There’s no toilet down here, sweetheart, and I’m running out of food. And you took my phone the other day. Also, I tried to climb out the window, but that seems to be sealed, too. Huh. Come to think of it, why do I hear a man’s voice out there? Is that Andrew? Honey, what the hell is Andrew doing over here? Open up, goddamnit!” At press time, the increasingly frantic broadcaster had begun searching for a way out through an air shaft after hearing the distinct sound of bricks being laid down outside the basement’s exit.
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