Ask Amy: How long is too long to wait to send a letter of condolence?

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Ask Amy: How long is too long to wait to send a letter of condolence?
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I lost my 25-year-old daughter almost 30 years ago. This past April I received a five-page anonymous letter from a guy who went to school with her. ... it made me sad but because even after all this time she is not forgotten and someone still thinks about her ...

I lost my 25-year-old daughter almost 30 years ago.From his memories he obviously had a crush on her.

When a year later I was still broken and mourning to a degree I felt was unhealthy, I gathered my wits, sold my possessions, and left town by joining the Air Force.Today, I’m retired after a complex and gratifying life that’s included world travel, several additional years of higher education, a satisfying teaching career, and last but not least, 34 years with the right person, the love of my life and truly the best, most supportive, complimentary partner I could have asked for.

I think it’s an important and very human impulse to try to pull the skeins of your life together, as long as you prepare yourself for the variables. Mr. Long Ago might continue to ghost you. He might question your motives and resent the encroachment. His memory of these long-ago events might be radically different from yours.

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