Dear Amy: Last week I had major surgery on my back.
I was abrupt and replied tersely that it was not the former leg injury, it was not sudden and that I’d been in pain for a while. I didn’t give them more details.I wanted to say, “What, are you writing a book?” or, “Why do you need to know the details?” but I didn’t want to get confrontational while I was crabby and in pain.
Given that you want to control how people respond to you, you could have been more specific in your original posting: “Wish me luck. I’m having back surgery today. I’d appreciate your good thoughts but am not supplying details just now. I’ll check back in during my recovery.”Please remember this: Just because someone asks a question on social media doesn’t mean that you have to answer it. Just let it float on by.
If you have stayed in touch with these people during these past two decades, and if you have a cordial relationship with your ex-husband , then you would consider attending any services in person, especially if your adult children would like to see you there.
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